missing mr.a alot

Missing you, alot.

More than you can imagine.



p.s. off to exam soon:) wish me luckluckluck !

p.p.s. i forgot to tidy up my room! messy! =.=

bizzare day

HEY YOU!

AM I PRETTY?

ok, im joking >.<

Just came back hme, am resting now:)

rushed everywhere today, almost late for my appt! lucky mr.A woke me up:)

anyway today is working day, so i look like a haggard OL =.=

The other day just went to partyworld to sing my heart out.

and of course with jinglin! singer of my pub. her singing is really damn damn power:)

Me, at partyworld, with crooked eyelash! lols.

after that rush back hme to change and went down amber to see see look look ard.

a photo with me and jinglin:)

after that got too drunk.

wasted, and dont really rmb much.

except the fact that i went hme and vomitted out the gall juice? ( dont know what is it called)

and smth happen which make me cry for hours and hours.

but after that im alright again:)

ok goodbye people, im so going to mug at macdonalds tonight:)

catch me there:D

sushi tei

At 3.14am, i was constantly fidgeting, rolling ard my bed, reading mummy's little girl by jane elliot and studying my notes, and nibbling on choc chips.

By 3.27am , i decided to sneak a peek at my phone and saw a missed call by mr.A.
calledhim back and of course he picked up my phone, sounding very grouchy because i woke himup from sleep.

We hang up phone around 5am, with him back to sleep and me continue to be restless.

At 7.40am, i called mac delivery because i was craving for big breakfast.

I dozed off.

At 9.50am , i sit at my bed, thn rmb mr.A has to go back to school to hand in his assignment.
so i started bombing his phone.
once,
twice,
thrice.

and thn i start to msg him, and daftly stared at my phone abt ten min hoping he will call back.

he didnt.

it funny that he always picked up my phone during ungodly hours but refused to pick up my morning call.

im feeling very helpless now. shit.




digging out my old photos to entertain mr.A
this was in my sec school days wearin PE.
oh im a very patrotic singaporean =.=

and thats yipping! i look so pale in comparison to her.
i used to be so fair and skinny! whathashappentomethatmakesmesofatandtannednow? D:

Oh hi!

im like blogging very frequently, because very long hours of me are spent in front of my laptop!

ineedtogetsomelifesoon, really. laughs.

Saw some sushi tei's photos of food just now.

and im damn hungry.

i miss sushi tei!

want to eat jap food D: awwwwww...

anyway congrats to mrs carole lee for giving birth :) ( urms, she's my p6 teacher )

i think your daughter will grow up as pretty and as kind as you:)

tml will be spent mugging for my business law's exam, meeting client at 3pm, having a photoshoot at 4pm.

got tons of request of shoots, im like arranging them everyday. hate it.

its funny, i used to have such a high level of passion for photography. for creating photos that tells stories, for making beautiful photos.

now i just dread it.

dread to make up, dread to leave my house for shoot. and dreaded the long hours of shooting >.<

whats wrong with me!?

maybe its because i dont really like to put on make up now. hmmmm

and Business law =.=

its killing me!

the law of tort plus the snail in ginger beer.

please pray that i can pass this with A !!

p.s. It hurts still, talking about my past.

every little facts of me pinches me still.

its funny how those betrays and abusive treatment didnt used to get on to me, emotionally.

but as i was talking about it, i feel the tears in my eyes.

p.p.s im tired, sigh. i dont want to provide for myself anymore.

i asked my mum whether she will be willing to give me allowance, she gave me that look =.=

wendy khoo

I have always appreciated all the little things u did for me, my similar-ly babe.
because thats how we grew close.
we were strangers the first day:) but we had the same brand of bag, shoe, make-up:)
thats how we click, and thats how we hold on to each other in the following months and i hope years .

even though you're not really in my life anymore, and im not really in yours.
you have always been a very great girlfriend:)
its the toil of work that slowly and painfully toil us apart:)
but we've still managed to catch some time with each other:)


life is still leading on to our own destination:) but rmb, no matter what happens. no matter what right/wrong u did, im not here to judge, im here to support!:D

and although we've outgrew our silly times tgt,

but im still here to share your happiness and painful moments.

and im glad to watch u grow up, to learn how to deal with work, relationship and money:)

and dear, you bday is drawing near again:)

soon you'll be nineteen:)

happy bday in advance.

my similar, my reflection and my babe:)

this post is specially dedicated to miss wendy khoo, one of my girl friends:)

Its 1.41am now, and im in super good mood, and i got good news to share:)


OFICIALLY ALL ACTIONS OF WOOING MR.A STOPPED:)
because u'll fucking never guessed that he falls for me:) and if all goes well, we will be tgt soon! nth, nth can stop us:)
yes, u do not see wrongly.
im alright , not very sad. in fact im totally the opposite from sad!

something happen, but i am not going to share!

p.s. thanks for all the trust u put in me, although your friends keep putting me down, but u held your utmost faith for me. i really feel that im so lucky, to have u by my side. really. and i'll treasure every moments of being with you.
you can jolly well trust me that i will cherish you.
and i really love chatting with you, about everything and anything under the sun.
mr.A, i love you.
so read carefully now, im going to promise not to behave wildly, get drunk or go pubbing or clubbing or anything. anything that will breaks your heart.
and im going to promise that if im your gf, i will never ever intentionally hurt your feelings. and i believe that we will not have any misunderstandings, because we will COMMUNICATE before jumping to conclusion.
awww, damn im so happy i dont have to mood to sleep :) and here is your kiss, muacks :D

hen wu liao

AHHA! i got nothing to do, so bored that i update twice in a day =.=

no la just a short update to ask

ANYONE FREE TO ACCOMPANY ME TO WATCH ORPHAN.
i very lazy to sms one by one to ask.
i know most of u watched le, but sms me if u haven ok :)

loves!

HEY you!lols.

ten things u dont know about me!

1. Im 168cm but my feet size is only 5!

2. I dont have ear holes, or any hole/tattoo on my body.

3. Im allergic to seafood and milk!!!! but i love jap food, and cheese and yoghurt. strange....

4. My forte is hiphop and badminton

5. My fav. past time is reading storybooks!

6. My fav cartoon character is hello kitty, but ive read all pokemon comics and have a collection of their cards!

7. I dont drink beer, hate it!

8. I have no patience to wait. hence developed the bad habit of being late >.<

9. I dont cry in front of my family

10. I love to shop ALONE :)

:) dressed up a little when i went out today, but as usual, lazy to put on make up :)

this is a black bodycon dress, shows my figure perfectly. WAIT THERE'S MORE!!

It shows my sexy back!

lols.

i bough it at signify :)

please support peggy's shop at bugis lvl 2 ok?

I seem to have a need to hear your voice every sec, and i love talking to you.

and thnks for all those sweet words that make me sleepless and happy:)

my happy pill

Teehee:0 did u all miss my photos?:)
lols, ok bare faced at hme! im sooooo lazy to put on makeup when i go out nowadays.
but my skin feels better :) though my dark eye rings are getting worse D:

exams are coming next week! im mugging every night DD:

so decided to put on eye mask:)
hope it helps:)

The gooey mess is the jelly that i randomly make for Mr.A

and the lunchbox is the bento set with six chocolate ganache.

lols, the bento set i passed to him though dont look like that :)

because after looking at the ugly bento set i changed the design, HAHA

females are fickle minded!!

lols, but it is super nutritional ok!

consists of garlic jap fried rice, brocoli, carrot,cabbage, long beans, gyoza, honey baked ham and seaweed ebi and sunny side-up :D

realised mr.A hates beansprout and longbeans.

likes onion and eggtart

the only green veggies he'll eat is kangkong and brocoli.

so unhealthy =/ lols!

but he say he'll eat anything that i cook:) hahas.

AND AND AND i realised a lot of people around me are reading my blog...

yes im talking about YOU! when are u reading! lols.

oh yeah good news :)

after resting for a month =.= i decided to take up shoots again:)

so i filled my next week and next next week full of photoshoots :)

no choice need to earn moolahs right?:)

DO ME A FAVOUR AND CLICK THE NUFFNANG ADVERTISEMENT on my top right hand corner, yes the proposal that one, just click on it :)

p.s. of course i want you to be my happy pill forever.

and i wish that time will stops here when im so contented with everything:)

mr.A, will u be mine? :)

hello :)

everytime u click on my blog hoping to see some pretty modelling photos right

but recently im not taking any shoots eh D:

im not hardworking anymore D:

damn it! lols.

today feels like im on cloud 9, because chatted with mr.A at my fav. place for more than few hrs :)

its started drizzling when we were eating ice cream but after that rain stopped, thoughi managed to see a very nice thunder :)

over-all, it was all very very very nice,to the extent i couldn't manage to sleep when i reached hme:)

feel like dancing ballet, on tipstops, to express how nice my heart is feeling now:)

bentoes!

k i super long long long never prepared bento le :0
make one for mr. A today:)
even though i was horribly tired!
i didnt sleep the whole night lo, thn early in the morning went to office to hand in some paper work.
after that went to plaza sing's daiso to get some accesories!

thn went hme to chop chop veggies and prepare.
and thn.... REALISED my home no oven.
so rush to Meixin's hse ( which is freaking hell from my house ) to bake my choc cookie,
and rushed back hme and whipped up the meal, in one hr's time? o.O

although not very pretty, but i wld say im proud of myself:)
im going to post up photos of it next time :)
next target: sushi and california rolls :D

shld be going to mac to study overnight again.
im bored D:

not interested to go down amber 21 / thai disco anymore.
have been staying at hme every night D:
B-O-R-I-N-G!!!
any gd recommendations to go at night? D:



p.s. been so long since i have the motivation to do smth sweet for someone.
i like this feeling :))))

find a hole and dig!

been very lazy to dress up these few days!

lols, here is my bare face photo! laugh at it please.

my halfway done chio N97! lols, lazy to finish pasting my bling bling:)

anyway i love this phone even though its damn bulky :)

trying to act toot with my len-less specs!

lols, cant resist making faces:)

anyway sorry for the bad quality photo:)

was taken using my N97 front camera!

thinking of baking some cookies:) hmmmm,

P.S. even though the whole world probably knows by now.

and i act as if i cared.

but the only thing that i care about is your feelings/ not your friends or families' opinion upon me.

i think i'll fight for it:D

i want to be happy

beloved yoyo!

some of my fav. photos over the years:)

when was the last time i really smiled?

Things are not going smoothly for me, i dont know to move on and fight for what i think i deserve, or just keep quiet and slowly slipped away?

I guess im not that strong afterall, even fighting for the love i want.

what i really want now is to dig a hole and stuck my head inside and wait till everything becomes normal again.

was it too much of a rashness to confess in that kind of pathetic situation?

or was it what my heart really wants? to let the other party know how i really felt?

listened to my fav. song over and over again.

i think ive posted up the lyrics before but im posting them up again.

Love me, by collin rayes

I read a note my grandma wrote

Back in 1923

Grandpa kept it in his coat

And he showed it once to me

He said boy you might not understand

But a long long time ago

Grandma's daddy didn't like me none

But I loved your grandma so

We had this crazy plan to meet

And run away together

Get married in the first town we came to

And live forever

But nailed to the tree where we were

Supposed to meet instead

I found this letter and this is what it said

If you get there before I do

Don't give up on me

I'll meet you when my chores are through

I don't know how long I'll be

But I'm not gonna let you down

Darling wait and see

And between now and then

Till I see you again
I'll be loving you

Love me

I read those words just hours before

My grandma passed away

In the doorway of the church

When me and grandpa stopped to pray

I know I'd never seen him cry

All my 15 years

But as he said these words to her

His eyes filled up with tears

If you get there before I do

Don't give up on me

I'll meet you when my chores are through

I don't know how long I'll be

But I'm not gonna let you down

Darling wait and see

And between now and then

Till I see you again

I'll be loving you

Love me

Between now and then till I see you again

I'll be loving you

Love me

Will there be a guy out there for me?

Who will promised to love me till im old?

despite being ugly, fat or whatever.

or im not that blessed at all?

infatuation

ZHENG XIAOTING!
its only a feeling, it'll go away.
stop feeling hurt and crying for nothing.


oh im not feeling well again, caught a cold i guess.
stuck in the damn clinic for four hrs becauses suspected of SWINE.
stupig pig flu!


thanks lawrence for the wake up call chat.
i guess like what u say, time reveals things.
things that im not aware of.
i just need to keep this feeling inside my heart,
and let time drain away everything.
im just not suitable for relationship, am i?

always the foolish girl to give up everything for the guy,
always the foolish one crying in the end.


P.S i am determined to love myself more.

and its time for the MIA game again

the proposal

Oh yeah, vina promised to accompany me to bugis tml early morn :)
we're going to eat jap food, thn go gaigai thn back to my school for my lessons, thn dinner, thn maybe jogging for me, and my event at night, and thn club. oh god!

&& i got my nokia N97 like finally!
been delibrating on blackberry/ iphone/ nokia e71
but i think i make the right choice:)
though the phone was super pricey!

ZHENGXIAOTING! uneedtoslimdownuknowstopeatingsomuchyouaregettingfatterandfattereverydayiswear!

will post up photos of my new phone plus my shopping trip tml:)
goodnight ppl:)

photos in studio

credits to respective photographer.

Ok after much thoughts, i think i shld still handle photoshoot! lols

bugis shopping

I am going to dumped half of my closet! like seriously! lols.
most of the dress are either too loose/ too small, if not out-of-fashion!
i swear i need to go bugis street this wednesday! even if i have to go by myself! lols.

tml going to school super duper early to complete group assignment!
goingto school life have been seriously dull but looking forawrd to tml's badminton session:)
i'll be posting up photos of my daily life, by wed? lols
haven been taking much photos! oh god i think ive no life man!!!!

anyone wants to watch the proposal?:)

being lazy

I am admitting to being lazy!
sales for me is no good at all this month!
and im not taking photoshoots at all for this month....

and im still spending like nobody's business.

CONCLUSION: no more shopping! lols.


Anyway thinking of getting a massage chair for mummy and daddy.
but alot of my friends mention its a waste of money!

but i still hope that i can buy one.
Any good brands or models to recommend?

email to jvnne@live.com!



Yeah, vina bringing me to night safari later in the evening :)

i have not been to night safari at all! LOLS.
getting excited! thinking of bringing my camera along :)



P.S. i am trying hard, trying so hard everyday.
i know god dotes on me a lot, always provides me with solutions.
but i cant help being greedy, i cant help asking for more.
i intend to seek perfection.

no more outbursts of temper.
no more laziness.
no more lying.
no more being a bitch.
work hard. train hard.


hoping to train up more on my stamina.
hoping to have more time to meet up with friends for basketball and badminton.
hoping to have time for dance lessons.
hoping to have time to cook more delicious meal.

ZHENG XIAOTING, hope that i can be more of myself.
i can love myself more.
and i can be truthful about my own feelings to myself.



i'll be strong, because im only here for myself.

love series

I always love to read sad stories of people's past to put myself in their shoes and feel empathy, and to make me appreciate and treasure more of my fortunate present.

I always love to watch drama series to remind me of everyday's life ups and downs and to find that little family love and boyfriend love back.

Laughs, but sadly i dont have a boyfriend now.

I really missed a someone to hug, someone to wipe my tears when i cry, someone to make me smile, and someone to hold on to give me courage.

Everyday i study hard, i work hard, but end of the day i find myself thinking who do i fight so much for?

Everyone told me, i dont need a boyfriend. i got everything else in my life.
and i told myself i dont need a boyfriend too.

but i guess when loneliness engulfed me, i'll think a little more.
hope for a little more.
that little more love.

where got ghost?

with different kinds of make up i look different. look so old here, lols/

I want to watch where got ghost!

deep damaged

YEAH, vina bringing me to zoo on monday!
i think she meant it as a surprise but i keep on pester and pester and pester her until she told me!
hahas, she bringing me to night safari too!
im going to prepare a good picnic lunch :)


ok short post, off to do my assignment.:)

late night

ok ugly face! lols, was at wedding dinner. i hate it when its starting soon but not starting so soon and uve to wait and wait! inconsiderate guests that came late! make me so hungry! lols.

presenting my handsome didi :)

one of my mum's friend daughter:)

ANYWAY! im having insomnia again! i cant seem to sleep!

have eaten all my pills so n.o m.o.r.e!

sigh. i need to go to doc to get more prescribtions.

i agree with the phrase of beauty in the eyes of beholder.

when i look back, i always hold phrases for everything about you,

now im not so sure anymore.

im glad that i have managed to let go everything from the past.

because living in the past, you'll never ever manage to learn to move on.

i moved on, and now i'll never settle for anything lesser.

never.

everything must be the best.

everything i produced will be the best.

oh oh oh, and i bought a 0.5 carat diamond ring from SK jewellery.

finally, after saving up for it:)

and now im going to wear it everyday! lols.

vina thought it was a ploy to trick guys into believing im married.

but im wearing it in the middle finger on left hand.

lols, not sure what it meant though.

contented:) just like this

with ser and vina at M hotel.
courtesy of the photographer after my shoot :)
ok photo damn blur, i think it was ser's phone and i grabbed it from his blog! lols.


Hey yeah! im blogging in super high spirits because ive completed my module's assignment and ive invoked someone! woo hoo~~


the real intention to not to strut about what ive got , and be an a**hole about it:)

but just to invoke you, and ive succeeded i feel so light now i think i can run 10km.

and speaking about running, ive been dutifully jogging at least 2km everyday!
im so disciplined!

im surprised at how much i wanted to work for SIN, and how much i want people to slap their own face.

oh yes be surprised at how determined i am.

no longer a fat chick! yes now i can laugh it with you because soon i'll be 50kg and healthy and pretty :)

even if i had school whole day, even if im stuck with meetings all night, even if im held up at my pub all morning.

i still took time to run!

and im so going to award myself after SIN! lol.

im happy now, contented that i got friends to talk to over the phone,
contented that ive got friends to stone and talk c**k sing song with,
and contented ive got family right behind me supporting whatever risk im taking!


anyway ive managed to watvh UP and GI joe yesterday.
some sort of movie marathon. laugh.
but both movies was only alright.
it was damn unnerving for me as i sat throught GI joe.
because i had a stone sitting in fron of me.
he was like sitting damn tall and blocking most of my screen!
making me straining neck towards left, thn to the right.

i was so surprised at my ability to control my temper.
because im not one to hold back a retort or comment if i feel like it.
but lucky i did not make a scene. laughs.
but i think my friends will not be surprised either if i did.

but it shows how muh the movie interest me thn. HAHA.
if i dont make sense to you.
read a second time,
if i still dont. please hover your mouse to the top left and click the X button.
thank you.

on second thoughts, maybe u should bang your head to the wall first. HAHA.

bye loves :)

im planning alot of getaways from singapore after oct.
to taiwan, hongkong, macau, KL and BKK.
any friends reading this sms my phone if interested to join me k :)
i dont bite!

contented

me and xingyi! bikini shoot. she covering her fringe because of the big big wind.

my beloved krislynn:)

i got red eye! hahas.

the next day, i wore red bikini for shoot! can see how tanned krislynn is ? no matter how long i stand in the sun, im still the same color! but im not complaining though =/

kelvin, WHO IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND OK! he's helping me to tend the store that day :) thnks if youre reading this. lols.

with esther, ice-angel. ( oh my god i need more sleep, my dark eye ring is super serious!

Super contented with my life now :)

im earning enough or myself to spend and save a little.

doing correct exercise! and on serious diet.

i need to be 50kg strictly by 5th sept.

though why, u'll only discover in a month's time. i cant spell it out :)

i dont want a boyfriend, and i dont need a boyfriend i guess!!

seriously ive been like mugging at mac and jogging everyday.

I CANT STAND MYSELF LE. i haven shop/lub/shoot/work for like eternity, i need some life.!

tml morning feel like rushing to bugis to shop and get new clothes! really.

but who will accompany me eh? hmmmm ;/

ok need to sleep update tml about shopping, bye.

mac's stone period

Im at mac now.
using vina's laptop to blog now to remind u people im not dead yet :)
Im not busy these few days because of work.


Ive paused photoshoots and events momentary.
and not rushing around so much.



im busying enjoying my life :).


ok goodnight peeps, bck to study.